April 2004

Views expressed are those of the authors, not necessarily of the AFSC.

Father and Son: Seeking Alternatives to War

Mel Duncan is Executive Director of the Nonviolent Peaceforce, an organization dedicated, "To facilitate the creation of a trained, international civilian nonviolent peaceforce. The Peaceforce will be sent to conflict areas to prevent death and destruction and protect human rights, thus creating the space for local groups to struggle nonviolently, enter into dialogue, and seek peaceful resolution" (www.nonviolentpeaceforce.org).

A couple of weeks ago our youngest son, Elmer, was sent to the Middle East to fight a war based upon deception and greed. Since that time my entire soul has writhed in deep, searing anguish. As part of the Minnesota National Guard, Elmer was called up in December.

He and I have had many discussions over the years about life, peace, nonviolence, and the planet. More often than not we found ourselves agreeing about basic principles. As a young teen he helped organize a rally that drew 10,000 people against the first Iraqi War. He participated in a send-off ritual before I took medical supplies to Iraq in 1999.

He joined the National Guard to serve and to be part of something he saw as important. While I disagree with his actions, I do respect his commitment and sacrifice. He is my son and I love him dearly.

Early one bitter cold and dark Minnesota morning, I drove Elmer out to the National Guard Armory, helped him unload his gear, and said good-bye. I stood in the door for a few minutes looking at the men and women assembling. Many of them looked fresh out of high school. A few were kissing their sweethearts. A few more were kneeling on the floor hugging their kids. Tears, fears, and excitement swirled around the room.

Since then I have slogged through a shroud of depression. So little has made sense. Everything was jagged. How can we allow such madness to prevail?

For over four years my colleagues from across the world and I have struggled to build a Nonviolent Peaceforce. A pilot project of 16 well-trained civilians is presently carrying out nonviolent peacekeeping in Sri Lanka.

We work hard every day to raise the money to send another peacekeeper. Yet, the Army can easily snatch my son and thousands of others for hundreds of times the cost of a peacekeeper. The Peaceforce's entire budget this year for expanding our team to 50 unarmed peacekeepers will cost the same amount that the US Military spends every two minutes.

The Peaceforce is not cheap - and it shouldn't be. Yet, when we reach our goal of 2000 trained peaceworkers by the end of this decade, our budget will only be the equivalent of Halliburton's alleged overcharges to US taxpayers between May and September, 2003.

I started writing to President Bush shortly after Elmer was called up. I wrote to him more as a fellow father than as a President. I asked him how he justified his actions in terms of his faith. On Martin Luther King Day, I shared with Bush some of Dr. King's insights from the April 4, 1967 "Beyond Vietnam" speech. I asked the President if he would send his daughters to a war that was based upon faulty intelligence, misrepresentation, and lies. Yesterday, I received a form letter from the Director of Presidential Correspondence assuring me that the President welcomed my suggestions.

I reflect on how much those hundred or so people I saw at the armory on that cold morning are sacrificing. On a certain level I respect that. I also thought about the dedication of the Peaceforce team in Sri Lanka. It is clear that the rest of us who strive for peace and nonviolence have to demonstrate the same depth of commitment shown by the individuals involved in these organizations. While demonstrating, advocating, and donating money are important, if we are to build a truly viable nonviolent alternative to military interventions, many of us, including me, will have to deepen our commitment.

I am angry, no, furious, that my son has now been taught to yell, "kill" on command, and to thrust bayonets into practice dummies. We must resist wars. But it is not enough to be against something. We also have to create. An attractive, achievable vision compels people to act. Elmer recently gave $50 to the Peaceforce, saying, "If anything is going to get me out of the war, it's the Peaceforce."

Within the firestorm of destruction, a new day is dawning. While they seldom make the evening news, the signs are illuminating the darkness everywhere. Organizing the Peaceforce has been a process of people finding one another. There are millions of us!

Let us not shrink before the pounding artillery. Rather let us be bold with our voices, our hearts, our minds, our money, and our lives.

This morning I held Elmer's daughter, Riley, and kissed her goodbye. Then I kissed her goodbye again. I did not want to let go of her. Let us hold all of our children, whether they are Iraqi, American, Haitian or Korean, kiss them tenderly, and not let go - so that someday they will wonder why there ever was war.

The Nonviolent Peaceforce emphasizes that we need to invest in the future of peacemaking. Buying peace bonds can help the Nonviolent Peaceforce create an institution capable of ending war. For more information, please see www.nonviolentpeaceforce.org.

Previous Article    Next Article